The Great Balancing Act: Working Moms, Stay at Home Moms, and the Beautiful Chaos of Doing Our Best

by Alycia Calderin

Motherhood: the job description nobody really reads before accepting the role. Whether you're a working mom, a stay-at-home mom, or some wild hybrid of both, you’ve probably found yourself wondering, “Am I doing this right?” Spoiler alert: you are.

As a mom to four kids, my life is a mix of carpools, deadlines, chore charts and snack requests. I’m a REALTOR, now a columnist, and I handle the payroll and bookkeeping for my husband’s contracting company. Some days I feel like I’m spinning plates while juggling flaming batons, especially when you add in teenage work schedules, choir rehearsals, sports practices, and school clubs. Sound familiar? Of course it does, because we’re all doing some version of the same wild dance.

Motherhood, whether you’re working outside the home, staying home, homeschooling, or doing a mix of it all, is never a simple one size fits all experience. Working moms are expected to juggle the demands of their jobs while also keeping the household running. Stay at home moms often have the added layers like homeschooling or being the go-to parent for all things kid-related. And no matter where you fall on the spectrum, the one constant is that someone always seems to need you for something.

And then there are the household chores. Let’s not even pretend that one group has it easier than the other here. Moms of every variety are expected to keep the laundry pile from achieving sentience, stock the fridge with food that the kids will actually eat and somehow keep the floors clean despite everyone’s apparent need to walk through the house in dirty shoes.

Enter the chore chart, our noble attempt to rally the kids into helping out. The results? Well, it’s a mixed bag. Some weeks, the kids enthusiastically check off their tasks like chore champions. Other weeks, it’s an Olympic level effort just to remind them that the dishwasher doesn’t unload itself. But hey, even the smallest contributions count, and seeing the kids pitch in, however imperfectly, is one of those little wins that keeps us going.

The juggling act doesn’t stop there. Whether it’s rushing from soccer practice to a school band performance or squeezing in a martial arts belt test between science fair projects and volunteering at school events, moms everywhere are running what feels like a nonstop marathon. And yet, we somehow manage to make it work, because that’s what moms do. We stretch ourselves thin, lean on coffee (and maybe a little chocolate), and show up for our kids over and over again.

The truth is, “having it all” is a myth. Whether you’re in the boardroom, running the household, or blending the two, there’s no perfect balance where everything gets done effortlessly. Some days, you crush it at work but forget to defrost the chicken. Other days, you ace the mom game but miss a deadline. And on the rarest of days, you somehow pull off both, though let’s be honest, it usually involves cereal for dinner. And that’s okay. Because “having it all” doesn’t mean doing it all. It means doing what matters most to you and your family.

At the end of the day, whether you’re rocking a business suit, athleisure, or yesterday’s leggings, we’re all in this together. The working moms, the stay at home moms, the homeschooling moms, the moms who squeeze in workouts while the pasta boils, we’re all just trying to raise good humans and keep our sanity intact.

So let’s give ourselves and each other some grace. Let’s stop comparing, stop judging, and start cheering each other on. Whether you’re negotiating contracts, overseeing a spelling test at the kitchen table, or watching from the sidelines at a soccer game, you’re doing the work of a superhero.

Motherhood isn’t about being perfect, it’s about being present. And while we may not always get it right, our kids don’t need perfection. They just need us.

Here’s to us, the moms who are doing their best, day in and day out. Here’s to the messy buns, the chaotic schedules, and the moments of pure, unfiltered joy that make it all worthwhile. Whether you’re a working mom, a stay-at-home mom, or somewhere in between, know this: you’re exactly the mom your kids need.

Keep going, mama, you’re doing amazing.